What Are You Doing New Year's Eve?
by TutorGirlml
Summary: A holiday oneshot, featuring Reid and JJ, and what happens when two people decide they don't want to ring in another new year alone...uses the lyrics from a classic holiday song to set the mood in the beginning


Hope all of you reading this had a wonderful New Year's celebration, and that 2008 has gotten off to a wonderful start for you and all your loved ones! I should be posting the next chapter of "Come Back to Me" and I will be soon, but I wanted to do a short little something in the spirit of the holidays and focusing on different characters, just to switch it up a bit. Enjoy!

What Are You Doing New Year's Eve?

By: TutorGirlml

"_When the bells all ring,_

_and the horns all blow,_

_and the couples we know are finally kissing,_

_Will I be with you,_

_or will I be among the missing?_

_Maybe it's much too early in the game,_

_Oh but I thought I'd ask you just the same,_

_What are you doing New Year's, New Year's Eve?_

_Wonder whose arms will hold you good and tight,_

_when it's exactly 12 o'clock that night,_

_welcoming in the New Year, New Year's Eve_

_Maybe I'm crazy to suppose,_

_I'd ever be the one you chose_

_out of the thousand invitations you receive_

_Ah, but in case I stand one little chance,_

_Here comes the jackpot question in advance,_

_What are you doing New Year's, New Year's Eve?"_

The starlight outside twinkled on the fresh snow like some cosmic jeweler had scattered crystals over her front lawn. She wished the snow had come in time for Christmas, instead of now, almost a week later, when the holiday was over and it was too late to get into the spirit. Maybe if there had been snow, she would have a little more holiday cheer. As it was, she felt more like the Grinch, and she hated that her favorite time of year had come and gone and she hadn't even been able to enjoy it.

Normally, Jennifer Jareau would have been able to blame her lack of merry feelings on some particularly heinous case the team was working, but they were nearing the end of a week-long break Hotch had somehow managed to get them all as what he called their Christmas present. Even her paperwork was actually caught up, and she'd been ordered – kindly, but firmly – to relax and recharge like everyone else on the team. Under no circumstances was she to spend the entire vacation looking over and lining up new cases for them either, those had been Hotch's exact words. So instead she was left to sit home alone in her cozy apartment, somehow feeling sorry for herself and lonely; both emotions she didn't usually allow herself the luxury of.

But JJ was simply alone. There was no way around it, now that she'd really had time to slow down and notice. The holidays were supposed to be spent with family, or at least with someone you loved. JJ wanted that, but there was no way she was going to fly home to Pennsylvania to listen to her aunt henpeck her about how she was wasting her life and how dangerous her job was. She didn't want to be told to come home and get a sensible job, find a husband, and settle in to run a home and have babies. So family was out. And she hadn't allowed herself to get close enough to any guy to have a boyfriend to be sitting here with either. She'd dated a few fellow agents that had seemed like decent prospects, but all of them seemed to have the notion that she would retire from the Bureau if they got serious and be there waiting at home for them each night when they'd finished a rough day. Or else they were full of themselves and their own importance, or they were all hands and couldn't keep their mitts off her throughout the course of a first date. JJ had simply had it with all of them and given up the dating scene a while ago. There had to be a better way to find a man that would care about her for the right reasons, but she hadn't figured it out yet.

Beyond all that, she was frustrated with herself for another reason. She had gotten too close to the last case. She knew she had worried Hotch when he'd gotten a glimpse past her calm veneer, when she'd let her usual cool composure falter. In fact, she was afraid that was where this whole vacation present idea had come from. Normally, she managed to keep a safe distance from the victims of their unsubs, to keep all emotions but a vague, compassionate sympathy out of her dealings with them. She wasn't even sure why this one had been different; whether it was because the young female victims had reminded her of herself at their age, or because of the impact of the case on not just the victim's families, but two generations of the killer's family as well, or if it had been the idea that the sort of sadistic torment they'd encountered was a hereditary trait carried on and impossible to stop, no matter how they fought to vanquish it.

It was too late now to try to deny the crack in her armor. She'd just have to patch it up the best she could and get back to work as smoothly and efficiently as ever when she returned to Quantico in two days. Let Hotch know that she was still completely capable of doing her job; that she wasn't going to fall apart after a rough case got to her. She'd appreciated his understanding of what she was feeling, but she didn't want to seem weak, or unable to be the best media liaison the team could possibly have. She was as proud of her importance to the team as any of the rest of its members were, and she didn't want that to change.

Leaning forward from where she was curled up comfortably in the corner of her couch, nestled against its arm, JJ reached for the glass of red wine she'd been nursing for a good couple hours already. Wrinkling her nose as she swallowed, she thought to herself how silly it was to drink when she didn't honestly even like the taste. But she wanted to relax, wanted to unwind, wanted to forget how insecure and unsettled she suddenly felt, and to stop feeling the deep unhappiness that she had been refusing to see within herself for so long, but was feeling strongly now.

With a defeated sigh, she sank back into her seat again, wondering what exactly it was that she wanted to make her feel better and return her sense of self-assurance and control to her. Reaching out for the remote, she switched from the mind-numbing New Year's Rockin' Eve coverage she'd been zoning out on and pushed play to start the homemade video in her VCR. Maybe her old favorite Christmas movie, that she'd never gotten around to taking time for this year, would be able to cheer her up.

She had to have a little giggle at herself, and the picture she would make if any of her teammates could see her at this moment. She was curled up on her couch in a navy Penn State sweatshirt so huge that it fell off one shoulder and ratty grey sweatpants watching "A Very Brady Christmas" and cautiously trying to get herself a buzz.

The thought of her coworkers brought a certain lanky, awkward genius to mind. Spence; a tiny smile crept over her lips, and – though she didn't know it – a twinkle came into her eye at his appearance in her thoughts. There was something incredibly heartwarming about him, even when he exasperated her with his never-ending flow of sometimes useless facts or his hesitance and fumbling, as if he still wasn't sure they accepted him. She hadn't really allowed herself to puzzle out just what it was about him that made an entire jumble of emotions come loose within her: affection, impatience, worry, fear, protectiveness, guilt, and occasionally when he ran his graceful long-fingered hands through his hair to tuck it behind his ear or opened his mouth to add some little insight to a profile, she even felt want and desire like she'd never experienced before. She'd wished many times that he would act on the attraction that she was sure he felt as well. Frustration and disappointment had coiled within her as time had passed and he never had. But she wouldn't make the move herself either, it was too important for her to risk messing up. She had to be sure that it was something they both wanted, something they could both handle. JJ knew they would have to be able to continue working together efficiently, despite all the complications a relationship between them could entail. Neither of them would be willing to give up the jobs they loved, or the friendship the two of them had, to try a romance if the risk of it failing were too great.

And yet, she knew deep down in her troubled soul, as she sat trying and failing to watch her movie, that if Spence were sitting here with her tonight, his arm around her shoulder as she snuggled into his side, so perfect in her mind's eye that she could almost feel it, almost picture it, her world would look a whole lot better. Instead, she could only sit, glumly eying the present she'd bought and wrapped for him, kicking herself that it was still sitting alone under her tree.

She closed her eyes, berating herself for her own weakness and trying to banish all her irritating, troubling thoughts, and it was then that she heard the ringing of the doorbell. Glancing curiously at the clock on the mantelpiece to see that it was nearly 11:30 at night, she wondered who it could possibly be. None of her friends or family members were here in town, and all her teammates had gone to the Bureau's New Year's Eve Gala. She'd even thought she'd heard Morgan and Prentiss trying to coerce Spence into attending with the rest of the group. Still trying to force him to blow off some steam and 'live a little', as if their way of doing that was the only way it could be done. She knew Spence would much rather go home and escape into a decent book or a sci-fi marathon on TV, and this night, she'd felt much the same way. She just hadn't been up for a party, and she figured that by now they were all feeling pretty good and certainly not missing her.

Standing, she cautiously made her way over to the peephole in her door and glanced through, not at all sure that she'd let whoever it was on her doorstep in. But her breath caught in surprise when she saw Spence himself standing there on the welcome mat, looking anxious, and rubbing mittened hands together against the cold wind and crazily whirling snow. Without another thought, she unlocked the door and jerked it open, curiosity written all over her face.

"Spence!" she exclaimed, "What are you doing here? It's freezing out! Get in out of the wind!" She took his arm at the elbow and pulled him inside when he hesitated, causing him to trip in the doorframe and fall into her, almost taking them both to the floor. He quickly righted himself and her too, catching her by the shoulders and hanging on, surprising her again as the contact stole her breath away.

"Sorry," he sputtered, eyes shifting away from hers to glance down at his hands. His cheeks then quickly flushed red as he realized that his cold, snowy mitten was covering flawless bare skin where her sweater was too roomy and baring her shoulder. "Sorry!" he blurted again, jerking his hand away as though he thought it had burned her. In reality, it only ached when the contact with him was taken away, and she had to close her eyes for a second as the familiar disappointment washed over her again.

Wishing she didn't need him so desperately right then, she took a steadying step back away from him, closing the door as she did and then turning to lead him into the living room. "It's okay," she said softly, as he still continued to look embarrassed, "Hang your coat up and come in."

He did as he was told, shaking the snow out of his now-somewhat damp hair while he was still in the entryway and then following her.

"Would you like some wine?" she asked nervously, feeling stupid for some reason that he'd caught her sadly drinking alone, "Or some coffee? I could make some…" She started around him for the kitchen, but he stopped her, reaching out and catching her hand in his as she started by him.

"No, JJ, w-wait a second. There's…there's something I need to tell you first."

"What's that, Spence?" she asked, tingles igniting all the way up her arm from her fingers that were caught in his, but not daring to get her hopes up, he wasn't going to take this anywhere. She was used to the way they danced around each other by now, and she wasn't anxious to be disappointed anymore than she already was tonight. "I would have seen you at work day after tomorrow. What are you doing here anyway? I thought you were going to the New Year's Bash with Emily and Morgan."

He opened his mouth, then snapped it shut again, looking hurt by her tone of voice, eyes squinching up just a little as he curiously tried to read in her face what was going on behind her own injured-looking blue eyes. Then, he tried again, his words pouring out in a rush, stuttering here and there, but finally getting them out. "I was, I mean, I did go. But I didn't want to be there. I was just standing around, feeling out of place. And when Garcia got Morgan distracted dancing with her, and Hotch offered to dance with Emily, I took off. I just- I just didn't want to be there. I wanted to be with you. So here I am, I hoped you were home and I took a chance and came."

She looked up at him, bewilderment and hope warring in her gaze, as she stunned him, her delicate golden eyelashes framing that doe-eyed, innocent face, strands of silky golden hair escaping her ponytail and brushing her cheeks and her graceful neck, caressing her skin the way his fingers had itched to do since he'd first laid eyes on her. It had taken him much, much too long to do this, but he wasn't hesitating now, and with a prayer for bravery, he went for it.

Pulling her into his arms with a strength that shocked JJ, Reid leaned over and kissed her, his lips crashing down to meet hers in a way that seemed to make his own brain explode. He didn't even think about what he was doing, just let instinct and desire take over, claiming her mouth as his own. He'd had a few kisses in his time, but never one like this, and he didn't intend to stop unless she made him. His mouth curled into a grin without separating from hers, when he heard her make a faint little whimpering noise, her one hand curling into the hair at the nape of his neck and the other fisting in his sweater. Her body slumped lightly against him, almost like her knees had given way on her, and his hand on the small of her back felt a shiver run down her spine.

The kiss went on and on, as if both of them were afraid the dream they'd entered would evaporate if they pulled away. He hadn't even realized they'd moved until his hip bumped into her couch, stopping him short and breaking them apart. JJ looked up at him, dazed and panting, and he knew he'd never seen her look so beautiful. One of her tiny hands came up to touch his cheek, marveling that she could finally touch him this way, and she finally managed to breathe out, "Do you mean it, Spence? Do you really want this? Want us?"

His eyes widened, goggling at her incredulously, "Are you kidding, JJ?" he sputtered. "Of course I want this! I've wanted to kiss you, to touch you, for as long as I've known you. I never thought you'd feel the same. I just couldn't seem to stifle it anymore tonight. I made it my New Year's resolution on my way over here, to finally let you know how I felt. But I completely expected you to say you only wanted to be friends. I never thought…Do you mean to tell me that I could have done this months ago?" He looked completely floored, and she had to giggle at how ridiculous they'd both been.

She only nodded her head, taking his hand to steer him around to the front of the couch as she did. "Oh yeah," she replied, giving him the naughtiest look she could muster, just to see what he would do. "I've been dying for you to."

"JJ," he started, looking as if he was going to try to explain himself, or what they were doing, or something else, but right then she couldn't bear for those lips of his to be doing anything but kissing her again.

"Spence, not now, please," she interrupted, almost begging him, as she leaned in and pushed him back onto the couch, knowing she'd be embarrassed later at her brazenness, but her desire for the moment overriding her sense. Her lips skimmed over his jawline, and began exploring his neck as she whispered. "Please, not now, just keep kissing me, _please_…"

With a growl that stunned her almost as much as the scalding kiss he'd captured her in mere minutes before, he adeptly flipped them so that she now found herself lying on her back on the couch, pressed deliciously beneath him. His hands shoved the sweater that had caused him so much trouble earlier down her arm and his tongue was suddenly touching her skin as he kissed along her shoulder, and such a violent shudder rocked through her that she knew they'd both felt it. "Like that do you?" he questioned, his voice raspy and his eyes darker than she'd ever seen them as he gazed down at her, pinning her so that she felt she couldn't even move, knowing she never wanted to anyway.

"Spence…" she whispered, not even knowing what she wanted to say anymore, or what she was thinking, her thoughts all jumbled up in a frenzy as she tried to touch him only to find that he really wasn't going to let her move. He simply found her mouth again, completely taking her over and melting all her bones and muscles to mush as she lay there, hoping he'd never stop and wondering why she'd never completely realized this side of him existed.

Both his hands moved up to cup her face, stroking her cheeks as he kept kissing her and she wrapped her arms around his lanky torso as he did, holding onto him tightly, never wanting him to stop, wanting to keep him with her here like this forever. And before she knew it, tears were pouring silently down her face. She didn't want to cry, didn't want anything to disturb this moment, but it crept up on her too suddenly for her to stop it.

Reid jerked away, feeling the moisture on her skin and feeling her lips began to tremble. "JJ, what's wrong? Did I hurt you? What is it, honey?" He sat up, pulling her with him, and stroking a hand through her hair, smoothing it back from her face. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. Baby, please, what's wrong?"

The endearment from his lips was her undoing, and to her extreme dismay she began to sob in earnest. He probably would have run, he looked so startled and frightened by this sudden change in her, but she was holding onto him too tight, her head buried in his chest. So, instead, he wrapped her up tightly in his arms, his chin resting on top of her head, lightly placing kisses in her hair, and his hands absently stroked wide, soothing circles over her back. "JJ, are you alright?" he tried again, hoping he was handling this right.

Finally, after a couple of excruciatingly long minutes, she got herself back under control, and sniffling, she pulled just a few inches back from him to look up into his concerned eyes. She was the one blushing furiously now, and she wondered what she could possibly say for herself to explain it to him. She'd completely ruined this moment she'd wished for for so long, and she didn't know if she could get him to understand.

"Did I do something wrong, JJ?" he asked, stroking her hair cautiously, as if he thought he might set her off again if he wasn't careful. "You have to tell me."

She shook her head, feeling a nervous chuckle escape her at his near-panicked concern. "No, Spence, no, it wasn't you. Well, it was you, but you did everything right. That's just it. I've been waiting you for so long, and I've been sitting here tonight feeling so lonely. Thinking that another year had come and gone and I still hadn't come any closer to having the one thing I want more than anything else in this world. Then you showed up, and Spence you just overwhelmed me, and it was so perfect that I was afraid any second I was going to wake up and realize you weren't really here and it was all a dream. I just want someone to love me – want you to love me. And I'm sorry, I just fell apart."

He sat there for a long moment, looking stunned, and her heart started racing, afraid she'd completely freaked him out, then he fiercely pulled her to him again, holding onto her so tightly that for a second she couldn't breathe, then she melted into his embrace gratefully.

His voice was whispering in her ear, sounding husky with fervent emotion. "Do you honestly think I'd come in here and start something like this with you if I didn't love you, JJ? I'm right here. We're awake; it's real, and I'm not going anywhere. We've both waited too long for this to finally happen, and that makes me sure we're not going to do anything to ruin it. Have a little faith. This is going to be really good, for both of us." He leaned over and lightly kissed her forehead.

She nodded, dazedly, her eye catching the clock again over his shoulder. Midnight. "Spence?" she whispered, losing herself yet again in the chocolately depths of his adoring gaze. "It's midnight. Happy New Year."

He smiled crookedly, whole face lighting up in a way that she had always adored and now could finally admit. "Well, I think that requires another kiss then, doesn't it?"

She nodded, and this time leaned in to plant one on him, it was more chaste than the others they'd shared that night, but it was also deeper and purer, meaning something different; a promise that stretched out over the new year ahead, and, she hoped, the rest of their lives.

When they separated again, he put an arm around her and sighed contentedly as she snuggled up to his side, her head resting on his shoulder. They were settling in to finish watching her movie and he couldn't have felt more satisfied. "Happy New Year, JJ," he said happily. "I _do _love you."

Smiling peacefully, she snuggled in a little closer, wrapping an arm around his stomach to hug him closer to her. It brought her more happiness than she could have imagined to know she was not going to fall asleep alone tonight. "I love you too, Spence," she whispered.

THE END 


End file.
